by Roxanne -

Gift Ideas that Do More

Most of us don’t need (and do not even want) one more CD, T-shirt or pair of slippers. Would you like to give a thoughtful gift, spend your money wisel and have it do something good for the world? My friend T sent me these fun gift ideas:

TicketKitchen.com

Try giving an experience of delectable dark truffle hot chocolate from The Ticket Kitchen – using sustainable ingredients and packaging.

 

 

 

Altruette.com

Another interesting idea is altruette.com making jewelry out of recycled sterling silver. They make charms and bracelets. 50% of the net profit from their products goest to the organization the item symbolizes and they have many to choose from.

Thanks T!

Certainly don’t forget donating in someone’s name as a gift option. Mary’s Pence is always my first choice. Their ESPERA Funds help women become empowered to lift their families and entire communities out of poverty.

Also, churches can always use gift cards for local grocery stores, local gas stations, and pharmacies. One year when I was a pastoral associate, a parishioner dropped off a stack of grocery gift cards. When I exclaimed “How wonderful!” he replied, “Last year I was someone who needed groceries from the food shelf.”

Before buying toys to donate – consider gift cards for gas, groceries and prescriptions that make it possible for parents to free up resources to buy the gifts they know their children really want.

You may also like Malls of Justice, Christmas Tree Hangover and Christmas Craziness or Christmas Spirit?

by Roxanne -

Weekend Movie Ideas

With Thanksgiving weekend upon us, perhaps you are looking for some thoughtful films to watch after the feast?

Here are two provocative Asian films I viewed recently that I can highly recommend. Both are available on Netflix – watch instantly. They will challenge your ideas of cultural expectations – for dying, living and eating.

The first is a film entitled Departures. A subtitled film about the ritual of caring for the dead in Japan. The cinematography is magnificent as are the rituals with their fabrics, and stylized movements. The touching care for the dead and their families parallels the directors handling of the topic of death itself. Interwoven is a love story about the ability of two people to learn that entering into love and life require trust. Food too, plays an interesting role in the story.

The second film is Eat Drink Man Woman. This story (subtitled) takes place in a household in Taiwan where it is the father who cooks. He is a professional chef who also enjoys cooking traditional, sumptuous, Chinese cuisine for his three daughters. However, they are less than enthusiastic about attending his elaborate Sunday dinners. Each daughter has a coming of age story which emerges in the film. There is a surprising twist at the end as the shackles of culture and family expectations are released.

You may also like Fresh, the Movie, The Human Experience, and Movie Waitress – It’s All in the Pie.

by Roxanne -

InnerPeace – Ending Emotional Abuse

Photo R. Meshar

Thanksgiving weekend is friends and family time. Unfortunately for many, it is also put-up-with-emotional-abuse time. Most of us are aware of the signs of physical abuse but we often forget that the scars from emotional abuse, while invisible, can be much deeper and longer lasting.

What is emotional abuse? I went to Domestic Violence: The Facts for a list of behaviors (but not inclusive) that fall under the category of being abusive:

“Destructive Criticism/Verbal Attacks: Name-calling; mocking; accusing; blaming; yelling; swearing; making humiliating remarks or gestures.

Pressure Tactics: Rushing you to make decisions through “guilt-tripping” and other forms of intimidation; sulking; threatening to withhold money; manipulating the children; telling you what to do.

Abusing Authority: Always claiming to be right (insisting statements are “the truth”); bossing you around; making big decisions; using “logic.”

Disrespect: Interrupting; changing topics ; not listening or responding; twisting your words; putting you down in front of other people; saying bad things about your friends and family.

Abusing Trust: Lying; withholding information; cheating on you; being overly jealous.

Breaking Promises: Not following through on agreements; not taking a fair share of responsibility; refusing to help with child care or housework.

Emotional Withholding: Not expressing feelings; not giving support, attention, or compliments; not respecting feelings, rights, or opinions.

Minimizing, Denying and Blaming: Making light of behavior and not taking your concerns about it seriously; saying the abuse didn’t happen; shifting responsibility for abusive behavior; saying you caused it.”

If you experience any of these behaviors from people you are expected to spend time with during the holidays or anyone in your life – consider minimizing or eliminating time with this person(s). If the person is your spouse or someone that you must deal with every day go to counseling to gain clarity and coping skills.

No one should have to put up with abuse in any form. Emotional abuse is emotional terrorism.

This Thanksgiving, be grateful for the supportive and healthy relationships in your life, trust yourself and be thankful for the Wisdom present in your own heart.

You may also like Celebration of Family, Irish Heritage and Don’t Worry – Be Happy.