by Roxanne -

Authentic Living

Photo DesktopNexus.com
Recently I had the occasion to reconnect with the woman who was my principal for eight years in grade school. She is just as bright, vibrant and sharp today as she was then. While she worked many years in education and administration, she still works three days a week as a chaplain. Her focus has always been in the area of social justice and service. I credit her and her faculty with my own interest in service and social justice.

However, there is more going on here than simply a focus on justice. The capacity to focus on others in a permanent way allows us to “de-center” ourselves. It is in “de-centering” or becoming other-centered that we experience a deeper, more permanent happiness and joy.

This can feel like a scary process that involves giving up control. However, in reality any feelings of security or control we imagine we have are really illusory. There is no real security or control in life. Life lives us. We are being lived.

Often circumstances in our lives will naturally move us towards this process of becoming other-centered. Falling in love, becoming a new parent, religious conversion or work situations can nudge us toward de-centering temporarily. This is why new lovers are so happy, as are new parents. But not until it becomes a permanent way of living and being will joy and happiness envelop us and permeate our lives.

The medical profession knows too. Those struggling with depression or recovering from addiction are encouraged to volunteer and engage in service. They are encouraged to “de-center” as part of their healing.

Bring more joy into your life. Learn about social justice. Focus on others in the world. In doing so you will become more authentic, bring depth to your life, become real.

You may also like Secret to the Fabulous Life, Authentic Living – Life Editing and Endlessly Interesting.

by Roxanne -

Fast & Easy Holiday Decor

With the holidays upon us — I thought I would revisit this post from last year reminding me that there is alternative way to spend my time, resources and effort. We always have a choice.

If doing this seems like waaaaay too much time $$$ and effort, especially . . .

FrugalFarmhouseDesign

. . . when you’d rather be doing this –

HouseOfBliss

Then maybe it’s time for something new. Try a few of these simpler, easier ways to let your house know it’s holiday time, while still giving you time to actually enjoy the season.

Easier on your time and budget.

Easier on the environment.

Use this idea on any shelf, mantle or table, with pumpkins or ornaments

Griege

How about this?

Country Living
HouseOfBliss
FunLane.com
AptTherapy Evergreen Alternative

Or most simply

CelebratingMyHome

Decorating and set up – 5 minutes. Relaxing and enjoying – all month long.

Happy decorating!

You may also like Autumn at Botanical Gardens,  Christmas Dinner is Served and Don’t Worry – Be Happy.

by Roxanne -

Excluding Others Comes Home to Roost

This November, the conservative right finally succeeded in excluding themselves out of existence. White males used to be in the leadership majority in this country’s social, religious and political organizations, but no more.

Over privileged, white males are still tentatively in the majority for the elite 1%, including executives of financial, business and some religious organizations. Women who benefit short term from their patriarchy (there is no long term benefit from patriarchy) may align with them. But the handwriting is on the wall. Succumbing to racism or fear by excluding whole population groups is destructive for all of us. It’s a lethal strategy limiting the talent available to communities, companies and governments.

Clearly it is counter productive to exclude the interests of women, immigrants, people of color, homosexuals and those we decide are “disabled” or those made poor. It doesn’t work within the U.S. and it won’t work globally. To solve the complex problems we face, we must be a people willing to engage those we perceive as different (and it is only a perception – we are all part of the human family), listen to the experiences of others, include their concerns and share leadership with others in our policies, politics and decision making.

The voice of the 99% is getting stronger.

Can he play well with others? Obama had better wake up and listen.

by Roxanne -

Thankful Giving

This year celebrate a day of giving thankfully in a way that brings life, joy and happiness to you. For you, if that means being with family or friends you enjoy being with – wonderful.

But if this means a big, meat-heavy dinner with high fat and carbs, drinking or watching endless sports on TV – or worse, being with people you don’t enjoy – then do something different. Give thanks in a way that suits you.

  • Go walking in the woods – with a friend.
  • If the weather is warmer where you are, pack a sandwich, have a picnic.
  • Listen to music. Dance to it.
  • Drink hot chocolate or make yourself a pumpkin pie smoothie.
  • Light a fire in your fireplace or light candles.
  • Take the money you would have spent on Thanksgiving and drop a few grocery store gift cards at your local food shelf. Do it before Thanksgiving.
  • Learn more about hunger and what we can do to end it here.
  • Recognize that too much of what we have was was taken from others and was never really ours. Our wealth comes down through the generations, in part from a land grab from indigenous peoples along with the unpaid labor from more than 6 million people enslaved by whites. This transfer of wealth continues today. Read about it here and here.
  • Read a novel. Journal. Listen to the wind.
  • Cultivate gratefulness.
  • Cultivate solitude.
  • Listen.

With deep gratitude – Roxanne

by Roxanne -

Nostalgia or Reality?

Recently I watched Woody Allen’s film, Midnight in Paris. In addition to an intriguing plot, the characters in the film are nostalgic, romanticizing the past and pining for eras gone by. One of the characters in the film makes the point that indulging in nostalgia is merely a way to escape from dealing with current reality as it is. I think this is true.

We might long for the days of the “horse and buggy” but we don’t include the stench of rotting horse manure, straw, flies and a lack of refrigeration in our longing for “days gone by.”

People wax on dreamily about “the good old days” which when you really stop and think – in too many ways – weren’t that good at all. I’ve watched relatives spend hours telling the same old stories and glorifying the “glory days” of an era, of high school, of college or whatever.

On the other hand, these same people often steadfastly refuse to engage in honest discussion regarding current cultural, social or political events – because this is complex, messy, requires reading, self-reflection and can make us uncomfortable.

Our culture promotes sinking into nostalgia with it’s glorification of the secularized holidays of Halloween, Christmas and Easter. It’s another way to sell products and anesthetize us from facing the hard realities of our time. But it also prevents us from entering more deeply into the positive aspects of life too.

We can resist this however. Use these same holidays as a way to focus on life as it really is – both the positive and the negative. For example, go to both museums and homeless shelters, art exhibits and food shelves. Meet and talk with people from many cultures. Watch foreign films with English subtitles and try new ethnic dishes.

Reality and people are rich, diverse and fascinating – far more fascinating than social media, TV, Twitter and IPhones. Enter more deeply into reality. Experience life – your life – before it passes you by.

You may also like Technology Changes Us and Legal Nomads.com.