by Roxanne -

Happiness is a Choice

Happiness is a choice and a habit. I have learned that how I feel on the inside does not depend on my exterior circumstances. Individuals like Ghandi and Etty Hillesum are well-known people who have demonstrated this for us. Be inspired. Read Etty Hillesum’s diary, An Interrupted Life.

Whether we are married or not, have children or not, are rich or not, has no bearing on our ability to be happy. Once our basic needs are met, if we choose happiness, life will open itself to us. Enjoy life fully and then, regardless of your circumstances, you will have had a wonderful life. If marriage, children, the job we want, etc. occur – then that is merely icing on the cake – is it not? If those things don’t happen, life is still good.

Since happiness is a choice why wouldn’t we choose it? Like learning to play the piano, choosing a life of happiness requires daily practice that keeps us healthy in body and mind.

How do we choose happiness habits? We choose them – or not – a thousand times each day. Here are some choices for happiness we can make today:

Play, skip, volunteer, exercise, stretch, build deeper relationships, read what inspires you, use your imagination, dance, cook for yourself, cook for others, sit and just listen, do nothing, listen to music, meet new people, smile, laugh, sing, enjoy nature, pray, meditate, find awe in the ordinary, be willing to be surprised, breathe deeply, discover yourself, enjoy time alone.

All that is required to choose happiness is to have our most basic needs met. That is why it is important to work for change so others’ basic needs are met – then they will have the ability to choose happiness too.

Choose happiness habits today!

Coming soon . . .

Recently this blog visited Paris and Dublin. Next time we are off to Juarez, Mexico. Join me.

Photo A. Meshar

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by Roxanne -

Babette’s Feast

Photo Babette's Feast

Babette’s Feast (same name as the film) came about when I and two friends decided to prepare an autumn feast. One of us (not me;-))lived in a large, old, Victorian home in Hyde Park, Chicago.

We invited family and friends. I remember that my brother and his kids were visiting Chicago and joined us. We created a menu of autumn foods. Everyone was asked to bring one ingredient. No one knew what their ingredient would be used for.

When everyone arrived, guests were asked to help chop, slice, and prepare the food. People who had never met found themselves sharing a cutting board and cooking together. Apples were peeled. Pies were assembled. Chickens and vegetables were roasted with garlic, lemons and herbs. Rolls were baked.

Layers and layers of linens draped the table. Squashes, pumpkins, and if I recall, wheat, candles and bread decorated the center of the table. We even found Limoges china in a hidden cabinet in the dining room! We used it. Cloth napkins and wine glasses were carefully placed.

We all gathered. Candles were lit. Wine was poured. Thanksgiving was offered. Food was shared. Incense was burned. Cello, voice and piano entertained everyone afterward. It was an amazing dinner. An amazing evening.

Photo Babette's Feast

Over the years I continued to plan Babette’s Feasts. I have organized dozens of Babette’s Feasts with many diverse groups of people. The menu has been completely different each time. Seasonal and local food is used whenever possible.

People come, prepare, share a meal, celebrate and are changed. Many experience the healing of being with a healthy community for the first time in their lives. It is always a powerful experience.

It is lavish. It is extravagant. It is elegant. It is simple. It is not expensive. But it is eucharist, thanksgiving, hospitality experienced in a very profound way. It nourishes the body, refreshes the spirit and renews the soul. God is made present and She is smiling!

Photo Red Couch Recipes

Some of the best ways to get the feeling of Babette’s Feast is to watch the movies: Babette’s Feast, Chocolate, Amelie or Like Water for Chocolate. Some books that are fun and uplifting to read along the same line are The School of Essential Ingredients by Erica Bauermeister and the classic, Like Water for Chocolate.

by Roxanne -

Of Passion Fruit, Persimmons and Pomegranates

Passion Fruit
Persimmons

Fresh Figs
Pomegranates

Being married to someone from another culture means that many day-to-day assumptions are different. But this can be fun and interesting. For example, if I have “fruit” on my grocery list I will check for apples, oranges, bananas or pears in the produce department. On the other hand, if you are from the Middle East and you have “fruit” on your grocery list this time of year, you are very apt to come home with small amounts of passion fruit, persimmons, pomegranates, figs and dates. Maybe even kumquats. This makes for a delectable fruit bowl on my dining table.

Persimmons are truly a romantic fruit. Intensely sweet, when ripened, they are like eating a golden-orange jam right from the fruit itself. Passion fruit is another memorable experience. A little goes a long way. They are a little more expensive but only buy one or two. Choose those that are heavier, they will have more fruit. Cut one open. Eat it slowly and savor.

Next time you are at the grocery store check for other fruit, or vegetables, that you wouldn’t normally look for. We often find many new greens or root vegetables that are unusual for us and yet grown locally. This is great because we can support local agriculture while trying new things.

Who knew there was so much richness and romance right in my local produce department? – but it’s there, waiting for us.

What can you try that is new? Explore. Try it out. Check online to see how you prepare it. Sample the lush vegetarian world at our fingertips. See what you think.

Kumquats

Passion Fruit Sliced
Whole Persimmons
by Roxanne -

Challenge: A Year Without Buying Clothes

Photo Savvima

Blogs like Six Items or Less, Miss Minimalist and The Great American Apparel Diet have inspired me to reduce the amount of clothing that I have. Throughout the past year I have simplified my wardrobe and donated many gently used items. Now I would like to go further and simply buy less clothing. Upon reflection I think I can eliminate buying clothes altogether – at least for a year.

Think of all the time I won’t spend shopping for clothes, trying on clothes or watching for items to go on sale. Then there’s the catalogs I won’t have to look at — although very few are delivered to my house these days. After spending so many years working in the retail industry (before teaching) this will be quite a change!

With the money that isn’t spent on clothes I would like to increase my giving to organizations that help solve the problem of poverty, such as Mary’s Pence. While charity helps the immediate situation, many non-profits are now focused on solving the underlying problems that cause poverty. Mary’s Pence is one of these. This is much more difficult and requires a long term focus along with extensive education. But it can, and is being done.

As for clothes, My husband suggested that, if necessary, I could always purchase something at a resale store – as long as I donated something for each piece I purchased. But I hope to avoid that entirely.

What do you think? Can I go an entire year without buying clothes?

Could you? – for a month? three months? a year? Take the challenge. Join me! Let me know how it goes.

P.S. No – this is NOT a picture of my closet – but a picture of my closet in my dreams.

Tomorrow – a trip to the beach . . .

Roxanne

by Roxanne -

Isn’t it Romantic?

Photo Apt. Therapy

In a previous post I mentioned that I was searching for a word to focus on for the new year. That word will be romance. The idea of romance and our great life romance has been appearing in many ways.

I think we are constantly being romanced, or seduced if you will, by reality or life itself. A book that explains this well is The Sacred Romance by John Eldredge and Brent Curtis. For me, reading this book was another opportunity to fall more deeply in love. Once we experience this joy we want to share it with others. It’s no accident that we speak about people as being “in love” – because literally they are. We are steeped in it or stuffed in it. Unfortunately we are not often aware of this.

Falling in love with life is a transformative experience. Although this experience creates more joy it also provides clarity. Our connectedness with others and with creation can be felt more intensely. Systems of injustice, discrimination or economic bias can be seen more easily as well. Just as those in love focus on the other, central to this romance is the idea that our well being  depends on the well being of others.

The artist in me seeks ways to create environments that attract and invite others. The pictures in this post show two examples of romantic rooms. While busier than my taste, they do evoke that feeling of romance – of the richness we feel on the inside.

Using items we already have I may try and replicate key elements of this look. Just like romance, these rooms have many layers and textures – rugs, pictures, books (my favorite!) woods, leathers, glass, fabric. However, colors are minimal or neutral emphasizing the layers and textures. The bedding is white, for example. The sofa is a neutral sage or gray. There is a sense of organized clutter along with a sense of calm. They are rooms I would want to spend time in, alone or with others.

Working in retailing taught me that the entire world is a stage or theatre, if you will. Creating a more romantic environment is one step to inviting romance into my life. Continuing to work for the well being of others will be another.

As the year unfolds I will continue to focus, watch and incorporate the idea of romance. Come along  with me . . .

Photo Apt. Therapy